petition to make ‘an extra hour in the ball pit’ a white card in cards against humanity
me: damn dude check out this blog
friend: that’s your own dude
me: yeah i know, sick right?
I love this
"you come here often?"
"hey baby did it hurt when you fell from heaven-"
"FAVOR THE BOW, EH? I’M A SWORD MAN MYSELF"
"hey let me buy you a drin-"
"LET ME GUESS: SOMEONE STOLE YOUR SWEET ROLL?"
"I LIKE SHORTS! THEY’RE COMFY AND EASY TO WEAR!"
"SOMETIMES, I DREAM ABOUT CHEESE"
I see how it is. Rihanna can wear a shiny, completely transparent dress in public and everyone loves it, but when I did it, I was “wasting saran wrap” and “ruining Easter, Daniel.”
so my mom brought home one of the new 100 dollar bills
I’m looking at it like “yeah this looks kinda cool”
but then you flip it over and
it looks like it has fucking wordart on it
They literally fucking used WordArt
coming out of your room at 3 am and seeing your parents
send this to your crush without any context
you know that thing where you scrunch up your arms and it looks like you have only hands well this one time when i was little i kept it up for 3 days no matter where i was
one time i also pissed off my entire family for 3 days
the last picture i cANT BREATHE
So my friend bought a new house. There’s a TARDIS in the back garden.
Words of wisdom from Ron Swanson.
Having none of your Lion bullshit today.